 |
| Photo: unsplash image |
Mu buzima bwa buri munsi, wenda warigeze wumva ushaka kwihumuriza umukunzi wawe cyane, ukumva ushaka kumuruma buhoro cyangwa ukumukandagura kubera urukundo rwinshi urufitiye. Niba ari uko ubyumva, si wowe wenyine. Abashakashatsi mu by’ubwonko n’amarangamutima bavuga ko ibi ari ibintu bisanzwe kandi bifite ishingiro mu buryo ubwonko bukora.
Iki kintu kizwi mu siyansi nka “cute aggression” cyangwa se “dimorphous expression”, aho umuntu agira amarangamutima akomeye cyane y’urukundo, ibyishimo cyangwa kwishima kugeza aho ubwonko bwiyemeza kuyagabanya kugira ngo butarengeje urugero.
Cute Aggression: Iby’ingenzi mu Bwonko n’amarangamutima
Abahanga mu by’ubwonko basobanura ko iyo umuntu abonye ikintu cyiza cyane, nko kubona uruhinja rufite amaso meza, imbwa nziza, cyangwa umukunzi we mu gihe cy’ibyishimo, ubwonko bwacu bushobora kwinjira mu buryo bwihariye bwo kugabanya amarangamutima akabije.
Iyo bigenze gutyo, umubiri usohora umusemburo wa dopamine, uterwa n’ibyishimo, hanyuma ubwonko bukohereza adrenaline kugira ngo amarangamutima akabije agereranwe. Ni nk’uko ubwonko bukora “regulation” ku buryo wumva ushaka gukora ibintu bidasanzwe, nko kuruma buhoro, gukandagura, cyangwa gukubita umuntu mu buryo bw’urukundo ariko nta mugambi mubi uri inyuma.
Abahanga bavuga ko iyi cute aggression itagaragaza irari cyangwa umujinya, ahubwo ari uburyo bw’umubiri bwo kurinda amarangamutima menshi cyane kudakwirakwira no kugira ngo umuntu agumane ubushobozi bwo gutekereza neza no kwishima mu buryo bufite umutekano.
Impinduka z’Ubwonko n’Umubiri
Iyi myitwarire ishingiye ku bwonko ndetse n’imikorere y’umubiri mu bihe by’amarangamutima akomeye. Iyo ubwonko bwumva ibyishimo byinshi cyane, cute aggression iba nk’umuyoboro wo “guhumuriza” amarangamutima, ikabuza umuntu kurengerwa.
Dopamine: Umusemburo w’ibyishimo usohoka mu mubiri, utera umuntu kumva yishimye cyane.
Adrenaline: Ifasha kugenzura amarangamutima akabije no kubungabunga ubushobozi bwo gukora ibintu mu buryo bufite ituze.
Ibi bisobanuro by’umubiri n’ubwonko bituma umuntu agira ubushake bwo gukora ibintu bisa n’ibidasanzwe, ariko byose biba bishingiye ku kwishimira cyane ikintu cyangwa umuntu, nta ntego mbi cyangwa igihungabanya.
Cute aggression ntabwo ari ikintu cyo kwirirwa wihutira gusobanura nk’umwihariko w’ubuzima bwiza gusa. Ni ikimenyetso cy’uko amarangamutima yacu akomeye kandi atunganyijwe neza n’ubwonko. Ni uburyo bw’umubiri bwo kwerekana urukundo rwinshi, kandi nubwo byaba bidasanzwe, bifite ishingiro mu buryo bw’imitekerereze.
Mu gihe abantu benshi batekereza ko kuba wumva ushaka “kuruma” cyangwa “gukandagura” umuntu mukunda ari ikintu kidasanzwe cyangwa kibi, ubushakashatsi bugaragaza ko ari ibisanzwe kandi bifite akamaro. Ni nk’uko ubwonko bwacu bubwira: “Ndabikunze cyane, ariko reka tugenzure uburyo nabyerekana”.
Abashakashatsi kandi bavuga ko cute aggression ifasha mu gucunga stress. Amarangamutima menshi asohotse mu buryo bwiza atuma umuntu adacika intege, ndetse bigatuma urukundo n’ibyishimo bitagabanuka ahubwo bigakomeza gukura.
Ibyishimo Bikabije Nta Mpungenge
Mu ncamake, kuba wumva ushaka gukandagura cyangwa kuruma umukunzi wawe kubera urukundo rwinshi, ni ibintu bisanzwe kandi bifite ishingiro. Si ikimenyetso cy’agahinda cyangwa umujinya, ahubwo ni uburyo ubwonko bukoresha mu kwigenzura no gukomeza kwishimira.
Abahanga mu by’ubwonko basobanura ko “cute aggression” ari isoko y’urukundo rukomeye, ituma amarangamutima akomeye atarenga urugero kandi akabasha kugaragazwa mu buryo bufite umutekano. Uko umuntu abasha gukoresha iyi myitwarire mu buryo bwiza, ni nako agumana ubushobozi bwo kwishima, kwihanganira amarangamutima, no gukomeza kugaragaza urukundo rwe ku buryo bufite intego.
Urukundo rwinshi, ibyishimo bikabije, n’amarangamutima akomeye byose bishobora kugaragazwa muri cute aggression, kandi ni ikimenyetso cy’uko amarangamutima yawe akomeye kandi afatika, atari ikibazo, ahubwo ni imbaraga z’umubiri n’ubwonko bigufasha gukomeza kwishima.